“She dey do big girl, E no dey follow us talk again”.
We all have said this at one point or the other, to others or at least to ourselves, many with these exact words, others in other arrangements and or choice of words or more formal renderings.
We’ve communicated the frustrations that come with not receiving the attention, care, other expressions of love and friendship we were used to receiving from people, and in the proportions we are used to in time passed. And like Adam taught us, we never really get to blame ourselves.
The first time I touched on this subject was in my first ever blog post. I recalled it in a conversation with my mum when she was asking after quite a number of my friends. I’ve come to realise friends come and friends go, not because we don’t want them to stay, but because if we don’t let them go we, ourselves, and they can’t grow.
You know I’ll never ask you to burn bridges behind you when people don’t call, chat you up or drop by your place like they used to. It’s not only childish, it’s stupid. If you find yourself in such a scenario, know that they might be going through stuff you should make the effort to find out how you can be there for them; although this is topic for another day.
If it persists, don’t force it, let friendships be, hold no grudges. We all have 24 hours in a day, the demands of career, ministry, family, business, academics, and every other word that can be used to categorize worthwhile endeavours we find ourselves in, can and does put a limit on the number of hours we have to spare on reaching out to others both on our part and the friend on the other end.
Friendships are in seasons, there are seasons of frequent communication mostly occasioned by the mutual benefits these people bring, and there will be other times when communication can be strained without offence or unforgiveness as the cause, and there are the other seasons in between these.
Bottomline is, you both know where to find each other when you need each other, without guilting each other about things we are also guilty of.
Hope this helps your friendships.
Don’t forget, You can preorder to Beat the queue and reserve an e-copy of the Author’s debut book, Dear Father, to be released on the 25th of February 2021 for yourself, at a 50% discount of #1000 by clicking on the link below